Summer Project and answered prayers

The Summer Project (SP) group arrived in Valencia on June 12th. With 24 students and 5 staff, they are the largest group to come work with Vida Estudiantil Venezuela and it has been exciting watching God work in their lives and on campus.  They are the answer to so many prayers and what God has done through them has been amazing.  In their first week they had over 200 gospel conversations!! It's sweet to see how God has brought laborers into His harvest field.  Their presence here is evidence of God's faithfulness to Venezuela.  He has a plan for this country and He has invited all of us to be part of it.
Specifically on the Engineering campus we have been able to do so much more and reach more students because we have 8 students going there everyday, in addition to myself and one or two other staff.  We were able to host an open forum in which we invited Engineering students to come and share their views on God, life and purpose.  There were over 15 students in attendance and we were able to meet many Christians as a result.  The SP students also organized the first-ever English Club on the Engineering campus.  This provided another opportunity to meet new students and begin building relationships with them.  Another prayer that has been answered is that an Engineering student began the first women's Bible study on her campus!  We are so thankful that the SP students chose to give their summer to the Lord and trust Him to use them!
Ministry in Venezuela has been very exciting this summer!  God is doing amazing things and we're so thankful for your prayers and support!

Summer Project students and staff at Engineering

Love Your Team

Our team at debrief

Our second of four STINT objectives, after "Love the Lord", is to "Love Your Team".  Personally, this has been the most challenging of the objectives but also the sweetest to see the Lord work in.  I met my team for the first time at our initial training in April 2010.  I was immediately encouraged by the way our team interacted and was excited to see how God would grow our friendships over the next year.  Throughout the summer we had weekly phone dates with someone on the team and had the opportunity to start getting to know one another and encourage each other through the process of raising support.  There were so many times over last summer when God began to show me how blessed I was through our team.
At our national briefing before leaving for STINT we were told over and over that our teammates are God's perfect provision for us in the coming year.  They are the people God has specifically chosen to love me, encourage me and sharpen me; and He has chosen me for them too  This has been a humbling and refreshing thing to be reminded of this year.  I could never have done this year without God's provision through my team.  I had to learn early on to open myself up to be cared for by them and to allow them to speak truth into my life.  I also learned to allow God to love them more through me and to love even when I'm tired or frustrated. It has been sweet to see the gospel lived out in our community.  The gospel has been central to loving the team this year.  At times when I felt like I couldn't love anymore I had to look at the cross and see the limitless love that continually pours out into our lives.  Seeing the ways I fall short in loving others also caused me to stand in awe of God's perfect, unfailing love and to give thanks.
My teammates have become some of my dearest friends and sometimes it's so hard to believe we've only known each other for a little over a year.  God has blessed me so much and I'm so thankful to have spent a year with such amazing, loving, godly, funny and beautiful people.

En Construcción- Vida Estudiantil National Conference 2011

In the week leading up to Easter we held our national conference for students.  Many months of planning and praying had gone into the preparation for this week and there were even points when we questioned whether having it would be worth it.  One of the factors the national  leadership considered was availability of staff to help in planning.  Many of the Venezuelan staff have been unable to report to campus because they are in the support raising process.  Of the over 30 staff members, only half would be able to be at the conference.  Another consideration was the number of students who heard about the conference and would be able to attend.  Because of the lower numbers of staff on campus around the country, there are fewer students being reached and so we had to consider whether it would still be worth it despite the lower attendance.

By faith, we moved forward with the planning and promoting knowing that God would make Himself known through the conference and bring everything and everyone together for His glory. He did that and so much more.  I went into the week not knowing what to expect and not feeling very excited about it, but I left feeling refreshed, excited and encouraged.  Since we were short staffed, we were able to delegate responsibilities to students and enable them to lead workshops as well as men's/women's times and worship.  They did a wonderful job with what we asked them to do.  It was all worth it.

It was a wonderful week of connecting with students from our campus as well as students from cities like Maracaibo, Caracas and Merida.  There were a little over 100 students at the conference, which is only half the number of students form last year but I think that God brought the students there that He wanted to be there.  Students I talked with expressed that they appreciated having fewer students there because they were better able to connect with one another and with the staff.  Students were also encouraged and challenged by the main theme, which was "Under Construction-Faith. Hope. Love."  The main speakers gave talks on how God is working in us to build our lives on faith, hope and love.  

Throughout the week it was just so evident to me that God is at work in Venezuela, drawing students closer to Him and making Himself known.  The ministry here is incredible and the people of Venezuela are so grateful, loving and compassionate.  I have so much hope for what God is going to do in this country and in their lives! Thank you so much for your partnership that allows us to be a part of something so amazing!

Students and staff of Vida Estudiantil Venezuela

Lent, and other four letter words

I've participated in Lent before but it was mainly for the sake of doing it.  I couldn't explain why I considered it worthwhile to give something up for 40 days.  My roommates and I talked a lot before Lent started about what we would give up and the purpose.  In past Lent seasons I've prided myself in being disciplined and making it through the season without any setbacks.  I had made it about me-forgetting Jesus and reducing it to an exercise in self-discipline.  This year God began to change my heart and challenged me through those conversations to come back to the heart of it and remember Jesus.  I began praying that God would use this time to draw me closer to Him and show me new things.
After much debate I decided to give up coffee for Lent.  At that point I was still thinking my self-discipline would make this a cinch and that I would just try to remember to pray more.  This was not the case.  I would describe myself as a coffee addict and even recruiter of coffee-lovers.  I love talking about coffee, thinking about coffee and drinking coffee.  Giving up coffee while living in a country with amazing coffee and with girls who drink it everyday is really hard.  My withdrawal symptoms were not that bad.  I was tired more but there were no headaches so I was fortunate.  What was worse is that I never stopped wanting it.  Even the smell of coffee grounds made my heart skip a beat.  It may sound like I'm being dramatic but my roommates can attest to this.
The weird thing with this Lent was that it never got easier.  But for that reason I think it was the best one I've had.  God answered prayers and showed me things I'm so grateful for.  I saw how my desire for coffee was so great and God was asking me how much do you desire Me? Do you see your need for Me?  Do you see that you can't make it through the morning let alone the rest of the day with out Me?  It began a shift in my thinking and and a reordering of my desires.  I saw the never-ending cravings for coffee pointing me back to my soul's craving for more of God.  God created us with eternal souls that need Him to live and can only be satisfied in Him.  On some level we all sense this longing but we struggle to find the depths of it and think it can be satisfied with other things, like a our dream job, travel or anything else, really.  The more I've looked into this, the more I've seen that trying to live off of those things doesn't bring life..and often we spend our lives  trying to get them only to find that it wasn't worth it.  But when we seek our satisfaction and life in God, we find it..and we want more.  My prayer throughout the season changed from, "Lord, help my cravings for coffee to go away," to "Father, help my desire for you to grow and let me not settle for what can't satisfy."
"I wait for the Lord, My soul waits,
And in His word I do hope.
My soul waits for the Lord
More than those who watch for
   the morning--
Yes, more than those who watch 
   for the morning."
                            -Psalm 130:5-6
As I sit and write this I've polished off what I've decided is my last cup of coffee indefinitely (I still love coffee but since I've been drinking it again this week I've realized that I'm healthier without it).  It will be hard but as I continue on this journey to knowing God better I hope to find an even greater hunger for my Savior and still more satisfaction.

Normal...or something like it

After something major happens I always want to try to return to normal. I always want to feel like I did before and even behave the way I did before..maybe it's a comfort thing.  There are a few things I've learned lately about "normal".  One, which was particularly surprising, is that it's constantly changing.  The normal I knew before college could not possibly be the same normal that I experience after college.  If it were, there would have been no purpose in going to college because it would mean that nothing had changed..nothing had happened to change the way I think and feel.  I didn't learn this until a few weeks ago.  I returned to Venezuela after two weeks at home and wanted nothing more than to go back to normal.  I wanted to just get back into ministry, back into our community and back into the strength and minimal concerns I had before my father was sick.  There arose so much tension within me because no matter how hard I fought to make things the way they were before, nothing seemed to want to go back.  I found that everything was different, including myself..and the solution wasn't to try to make everything like it was before I went home.  God had given me a new normal.  A "normal" in which my faith was stronger and my joy in God was deeper.  This new normal is better.
Another thing I learned about normal is that it can become a sort of safety net that we use to protect against the vulnerability that often comes with difficulties.  I thought that if I could just return to normal my weaknesses wouldn't be as evident to everyone, although I felt very weak.  I didn't want to be the girl who was struggling to be fully engaged where she was because she just wanted to be with her family.  But  I had to learn that my weakness was okay and that in the midst of it God desires to make Himself known.  My struggles and God's goodness through them have given me empathy and compassion I did not have in my old normal.  I now think that those major life events bring change for the better and they allow us to move beyond ourselves and deeper into God.

"But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead"  2 Corinthians 1:9

love and prayers

"No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us."  John 4:12

I've never seen God, but I know Him better because of the love shown to me by friends and family over the past two months.  Throughout my Dad's stay in the hospital and in the months since, I have felt God's nearness through visits, encouragement, phone calls, and many other things.  I can't express the depths of love that I've known through this time.  I've always read and even sung about the heights and depths of God's love.  I believed it, but could not fathom just how great it is.  I don't think we'll ever fully comprehend it, but I know that we can experience it more and more.  We can keep experiencing the love deeper and deeper, higher and higher.  And as God enables us to do that we are able to love Him all the more and love one another more.  We can be a part of seeing His love be made complete in others.

"pray continually"
1 Thessalonians 5"17

The greatest way I experienced God's love recently is through the prayers of people all over the world for my father and my family.  There were people praying in Venezuela, Kenya, Europe, all over the US and many other places.  There is such a sweet peace that fills your heart when you know that people are praying with so much faith and hope.  It is beautiful when people pray continually. God heard our prayers and healed my father.  My Dad continues to recover at home and is doing well.  Thank you so much for being in this with my family and praying for us.

Miracles happen

If you had asked me two months ago whether I believed in miracles, I probably would have told you yes. And I did, but only in that generic way that says, "Jesus turned water into wine. Of course miracles happen!" But I didn't really believe in them in a way that prays believing they will happen.  I had never personally experienced something where I needed a miracle so it was enough for me to believe with my mind and not my heart.
When I got on a plane in February to go home after a call telling me that my Dad was in the ICU and unresponsive, I didn't know what to pray.  The doctors had told my Mom and younger sister that he was brain dead and there was nothing we could do but wait and hope.  I didn't know what to hope for.  I confess that it was hard for me to have hope.  I began to take comfort in knowing that my Dad knows Jesus as his Savior and that we could be sure he would go to heaven if he died.  I also began to fear that if (and this was a weak if for me) he did wake up he would never be the same again because of the brain damage.  I also feared what would happen to my family, to my Mom especially.  All I could do was cry out to God..asking that He would help me walk through whatever happened with Him..asking that He would please give us more time with my Dad.  I prayed not knowing that to expect but knowing that I had to trust God.
Over the past few years of my life, a major lesson I've been learning is that God is good no matter what.  No matter how hard life gets, He is unchanging and I can praise Him in any circumstance.  I think that in some ways I allowed that to keep me from praying big prayers and from praying them with hope.  I figured, if things will be okay no matter what and since God loves to throw challenges my way, why pray that hard?  There are so many distortions here that God surfaced I can't even explain them all, but let me say that challenges are good and God uses the hardest things in our lives to strengthen our faith and make us more like Christ.  And He does long to bless us.  He is able to bless us beyond what we can imagine.  Sometimes that blessing is through difficulties and sometimes it's through the good things, through miracles.
I arrived home on Tuesday and went straight to the hospital to see my Dad.  The next couple days were spent at the hospital, watching, waiting..and trying to hope.  On Thursday we walked in and he was awake and sitting up in bed talking! It was a surreal moment..the doctors were all amazed and we were overwhelmed with joy.  We are so blessed.
Miracles do happen.  We don't know why God choses to make them happen in some cases and in other cases He seems to leave us hanging.  I believe that when God doesn't give us a miracle it's not because He can't.  I know He can.  I think it's because there is another work that He is doing and we shouldn't give up on Him or think that He has given up on us.  And when He does give us a miracle we should never stop saying thank you and living with hope.

with my Dad and younger sister